This is something fun that I found at least two years ago. The Christian comedian, Tim Hawkins, did a skit where he gave Christians cusswords they can use without endangering themselves, yada, yada, yada. I watched the video and legitimately laughed my head off. Some of them were actually very close to the curse words they were replacing. After the fact, I unconsciously came up with words of my own that I inserted at appropriate times.
Author’s List of Non-Violent Expletives for Every Occasion:
- Frickety mackintosh!
- Schnitzel!
- Juniper!
- Frick, Frickety, Frick, Frick!
- Balls! (debatable, but definitely better than the alternative)
- Bushel Britches!
- Suckerpunch!
- Pond Sucker!
- Farts!
And there you have it! Those are my Non-Violent Expletives for Every Occasion! Whip em’ out whenever you really want to say something, but can’t say that one thing. Hopefully, it will help alleviate the tension that always comes when people can’t properly express themselves through dirty words.
And on that note, it’s been real!